Jay Glickman LPCC
DEPRESSION • ANXIETY
TRAUMA • GRIEF • ANGER
BORDERLINE PERSONALITY DISORDER
PROBLEMATIC SUBSTANCE USE
It takes courage to ask for help. I'd love to talk with you about what you want to change, what's getting in the way of that change, and how I can help you find the strength and support you need to create change.
Frequently Asked Questions
How Can Therapy Help?
Therapy can do different things to help different people in different situations. For it to work, it has to fit you. Therapy works to the degree that you take it in – whether that means you adopting new ideas or practical solutions the therapist offers, or using the dialogue with the therapist to realize new insights about yourself. Every person and problem is unique: the answer to some problems is creating change, while the answer to other problems is to learn how to accept a lack of change.
Therapy can help you:
• Discover new ways to solve problems in your family or marriage
• Manage or regulate your emotions better: especially anger, depression, and shame
• Learn new ways to reduce, and cope with stress and anxiety
• Attain a better understanding of yourself, your identity, your goals and values
• Improve communications and listening skills
• Change old behavior patterns and develop new ones
• Better understand the past, and be less haunted by it
What Will Therapy Cost?
I currently accept Presbyterian, BlueCross BlueShield (BCBS), United, Molina, Western Sky, and Cigna insurance. If you have no insurance, I also offer a sliding fee scale; generally I charge $80-$120, depending on wealth/income.
Talk Therapy vs. Medications?
When talk therapy works, you learn new skills - new ways of thinking, ways of regulating emotions, ways of changing behaviors. You then have these skills the rest of your life, and solve other problems you might face in the future. This is how therapy empowers you; it gives you the ability you need to respond (not react) to what life can throw at you. While medications are often extremely helpful (especially with severe depression/anxiety, or serious mental illnesses such as Bipolar or Schizophrenia), therapy is longer-lasting, and does not involve any kind of dependency (i.e. on a pill). Having said that, for some people, I have experienced situations where people struggling with serious depressive and anxiety symptoms needed medications just to focus in therapy. So, they often work together.
Do I Need Therapy? I Can Handle My Own Problems.
SUPPORT: If you can solve your own problems, great! You don’t need therapy. If you have friends or loved ones who can help you, then you should definitely talk to them, and see how they can help! I STRONGLY encourage people to develop and use what we might call their “support network” - trusted others who can understand, validate, and help. It’s only when you don’t have this network (and many people don’t) – or don’t want to share your problems with them – that a trained professional might be useful.
PROBLEMS CREATE PROBLEMS: If you are solving your problems by creating new problems, then not-so-great, especially if those new problems are secret problems you can’t (or won’t) share with friends. We often avoid suffering by avoidance (by using a substance; engaging in problematic behaviors; suppressing our emotions; pushing the problem away), and generally these strategies just make things worse, as these behaviors turn into new and often bigger kinds of suffering. It’s smart to stop this process before it gets worse.
SEEKING HELP: Some people don’t seek help effectively. They ask for help when they don’t need it, they don’t take or use the help that’s available to them, or they don’t ask for help when they need it (because of pride, embarrassment or shame). Generally, this seems to be truer for men: they don’t like asking for help, so they don’t ask… and problems grow.
What Is Therapy Like?
WHAT DO WE TALK ABOUT? Therapy is different for everyone. In general, we talk about what you want to talk about, and what would be most helpful – which is usually your current situation and the issues you’re dealing with. My approach is such that I think it’s important to notice not just weaknesses and problems, but strengths and solutions. My approach is also to maintain focus on the present, but deal with the past when it seems clear that issues or events from the past are affecting the present (and the future).
ACTIVE VS. PASSIVE THERAPISTS: Some people think therapists sit back and say “so how did that make you feel?” (or say nothing). This is what’s called “passive therapy.” I am not that; I am an “active therapist,” meaning that I’ll actively join with you in our shared work to understand what you are dealing with, and what solutions (change/acceptance) might work for you. From the first session on, the goal is problem-solving, and getting better (in a careful, respectful, realistic way).
THE THERAPEUTIC RELATIONSHIP: In therapy, I am also a person; I’ll answer questions you ask, and sometimes I’ll talk about myself (appropriately). The focus is placed on you, but we also have to develop a real relationship, so that you can feel confident about the ideas and skills I suggest or encourage. In some ways, the relationship also functions as a mirror, and training ground, for relationships you might have in the real world. Like any healthy relationship, the therapeutic relationship is something that has to grow, gradually.
LENGTH: Therapy can be short-term and focus on a specific issue, or longer-term, dealing with more complex problems, or, personal development. Either way, I usually suggest meeting weekly for the first four weeks. Sessions last 45-60 minutes, and sometimes longer for an initial session.
FOR THOSE WITH TRAUMA/ABUSE ISSUES: Good therapists don’t go so fast that you become stressed and dys-regulated (and problems get worse). We don’t talk about traumas until we both feel you’re ready. The primary goal is always safety, and stability. If you have traumatic experiences, the work is first to help you develop the necessary skills you need, to regulate emotion, attention, and arousal.
I grew up in Toronto Canada. At age 40, after a number of careers (photographer, medical assistant, high school English/Art teacher), life circumstances led me to become a therapist. My education was based in humanistic psychology - seeing the whole person instead of just their thoughts and their behavior. Then, in my six years working in Silver City NM, I learned/trained in multiple approaches (including DBT) and had the opportunity to help all sorts of people with all sorts of problems. In 2013 I moved to Albuquerque, and after a number of years working for private agencies, and non-profits (working with homeless teenagers), I started my own practice. I love being a therapist. I love helping people.
Strength-Based and Positive Psychology
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
Dialectical Behavioral Therapy (DBT)
Eye-Movement Desensitization Response (EMDR)
Couples Therapy (various approaches)
Community Reinforcement Approach (for Substance Abuse)